Minister: Marv Vose

An "I" or an "It?"

John 15:9-17

            In a previous church, I came to know a young lady named Suzi.  She was in the youth group and I did some work with the youth.  She was actually too old to be in the youth group.  She had graduated from High School, but because of lots of challenges, we let her stay in the youth group. She was challenged mentally, physically and socially, but the youth accepted her and welcomed her in their midst.  Even if she was too old. 

            I left that church, but Suzi would occasionally write to me.  She has her fair share of challenges, but she can write pretty well and communicates with total honesty, which is always informative and refreshing. 

            This is what she said in one letter.  "We are going to get a new associate pastor."  She had misspelled the word "new" by spelling it "knew," but she caught the mistake, crossed it out and spelled it correctly. But here is the part that started to get my attention.  Now remember, I did not write this. Here's what Suzi wrote.  "We are going to get a new associate pastor.  It is a Lady."  But Suzi isn't done yet.  With real confidence and optimism, she continues.  "I don't know if that's going to work for awhile anyway.  You know when you first came, I didn't care for you much, but soon I grown to except you.  I will soon like this pearson too sooner or later."  Suzi is such a sweetheart, isn't she?

            I wonder though if you have ever felt like an "it."  Have you ever been treated that way?  There seems to be a whole lot of that going on these days.  Every time we turn around it seems like someone is treating us like an "it."  It has gotten to the point that we don't even notice some of what is going on.  Take your mail as an example.  Don't you love those letters you get addressed to "Occupant?"  It just makes you feel warm all over, doesn't it?  Or how about the mail with the windows in the envelope.  Your name and address peak through the plastic and you know a computer in some distant state has spit these out to just 9 or 10 million of its closest friends.  But every once in a while you get a personal note and someone has taken the time to write your name on the outside of the envelope.  When that happens, you know you are not an "it."  You are a real person.  But those are rare and becoming even more unusual. 

            What about the way people treat you?  Does it ever feel like you are an "it," instead of a real person?  Maybe they talk past you or you are just a part of the job.  One time I went to a Doctor's office to get my eyes examined.  He was, I'm sure, a very competent physician.  It seemed like he did all of the right tests.  He asked all of the right questions.  He was very thorough.  But I walked out of the office with a kind of uncomfortable, unpleasant feeling.  And I couldn't really figure out why.  But after I thought about it for a while, I realized what was going on.  It was this.  He had treated me like a reasonably defective set of eyeballs.  That's what I was to him, but I wasn't a person.   And it didn't feel very good to be treated like that.

            Jesus never did that. At least I can't find anything in scripture that would indicate he treated people like that.  People were always people.  And that was a dramatic change for the day.  They did not think in individualist terms like we do.  They tended to think of themselves as a part of the whole.  They were a part of a family.  They were a part of a clan.  They were a part of a nation.  They were a part of God's chosen people.  But they didn't think of themselves as individuals the way we do. 

            But when Jesus came along, he began to change that.  In fact, the whole growth of the understanding of individuals and individualism may well have started with Jesus' teaching.  He would say things like, "I have 99 sheep over here and one of them gets lost and I leave the 99 in the wilderness to fend for themselves while I go after the one.  Or he says things like, "A lady loses one coin and she turns the house upside down looking for that one coin and when she finds it, she rejoices.  Or he talks about the prodigal father who welcomes his no-good son home with a party.  When parents brought their children to Jesus to be touched and blessed, the disciples try to shoo them away because Jesus had important people to talk to.  Kids weren't important.  But Jesus said, "Whoa!  If you want to get into the Kingdom, you'd better become like one of these little kids."  And the teaching went on and on and on.  He lived it and he taught it.  Treat people like real people.

            And he asks his disciples to do the same thing.  It would be hard to make it much clearer.  He says he has loved his friends the way the Father has loved them.  And then within just a few verses, he "commands" them twice to love each other.  Twice!  Not just once, but twice.  He is really serious! 

            He expects us to do the same thing.  But it is so easy to treat people like "its" instead of real people.  It is so easy manipulate just a little bit or use just a little bit, thinking no one will notice or care.

            One little boy brought his pastor a bag of fresh cookies his Mom had just baked.  They smelled terrific and they were still warm from the oven.  And the pastor was so appreciative and so thankful he said to the little boy, "Do you suppose you could wait just a second while I write your Mom a thank you note for these six cookies?"  And the little boy paused and thought for a moment.  Finally he said, "Do you suppose you could write that thank you note for a dozen cookies?"  We can do that to people, can't we?

            It can be really hard work treating people like people, instead of "its."  Do you remember Suzi?  The one I mentioned at the beginning?  I didn't really describe her well.  She had lots of challenges.  In fact, she was a kind of walking disaster.  She would fall off steps.  She would trip on curbs.  She was always stumbling or falling or something.  And after a while, she developed this routine of catching me in my office on Sunday evening to talk.  She would go through a whole week of bruises and scratches.  Which was just the last thing that I wanted to hear.  There had been the services on Sunday morning.  There had been all of the stuff on Sunday afternoon.  There were youth activities on Sunday evening and I was tired!  I wanted to go home and rest!  But Suzi wanted to talk.  So I would struggle to listen.

            One evening as I was listening, my mind started to wander, which wasn't exactly an unusual situation.  But I wondered to myself if this was the way it was when Jesus listened to the disciples.  Did he have to force himself to listen?  Was he interested in their seemingly insignificant problems?  Did he struggle to stay awake when they spoke?  And then I began to wonder if this was the way it was when I talked to Jesus?  Did my problems seem insignificant to the Lord of the Universe.  Was it hard for God to pay attention?  I'm not sure I know the answer to those, but it helped me pay attention to Suzi.

            There is tremendous power in treating people like people, instead of treating them like its.

            I tried an experiment once while I traveled.  I decided I would try to treat the security guards at the airports and other people I met along the way as people and not as "its."  You know what I found out?  Those folks are pretty nice people.  They are doing a difficult, challenging job where most of the time, they are "its."  They are thought of as just another obstacle in traveling.  They get in the way of everybody.  But they really are nice folks.  It didn't take much.  A pleasant "hello."  "How are you doing?"  I commented to one security guard that it looked like they were busy.  He talked so long I wasn't sure I was going to get through!  And it made traveling far more pleasant for me! 

            When we treat people as "its," we become more of an "it" ourselves.  Does that make sense?  But if we treat people like real honest-to-goodness human beings, then it helps us as well.

            In fact, that was the whole motivation behind Jesus' teaching.  He said, the command is to love.  But the reason behind the command is your joy.  And I want your joy to be complete! 

            It sounds kind of funny in this modern world of ours, doesn't it?  We would prefer to be rugged individualists and independent.  We would prefer to disconnect than connect.  Fritz Perls came up with the kind of classic statement that summarizes so much of what our culture thinks.

            "I do my thing and you do your thing.

            I am not in this world to live up to your expectations.

            And you are not in this world to live up to mine.

            You are you and I am I;

            If by chance we find each other,

                        It's beautiful.

            If not, it can't be helped.

Do you catch the note of cynicism and despair in that?  There is a sense of futility in that writing.

            But a guy named Walter Tubbs came up with a response.  It is called "Beyond Perls" and it goes like this.

If I just do my thing and you do yours,
We stand in danger of losing each other
And ourselves.

I am not in this world to live up to your expectations;
But I am in this world to confirm you
As a unique human being.
And to be confirmed by you.

We are fully ourselves only in relation to each other;
The I detached from a Thou
Disintegrates.

I do not find you by chance;
I find you by an active life
Of reaching out.

Rather than passively letting things happen to me,
I can act intentionally to make them happen.

I must begin with myself, true:
But I must not end with myself:
The truth begins with two.

            Our own health and our own joy depend on how well we follow Jesus' command.  That's why he told us.  But we have to continually re-discover the truth of Jesus' teaching, especially in this world that neglects it.

            Dr. Karl Menninger, the famous therapist, said it succinctly.  He said, "Love cures.  It cures those who give it and it cures those who receive it."

            That happens here at Sunrise.  If you're new, you may not have experienced it fully as of yet, but that was probably what drew you here.  People treated you like you were a real person.  If you have been here a while, you know it to be true.  That is probably what keeps you coming to Sunrise.  People treat you like a person.  It goes on all of the time, but we don't think about it much or talk about it.  It just happens.  But when we step back and ponder the setting, we know it is true.

            I got this note from a member who moved to another state.  It was written as a "thank you" to all of you and this is what he said.  "Thank you so very much for your lovingkindness. I think God sent me to Sunrise, and I think that saved my life during a time of great troubles. You've touched my heart and I will never forget you."

"Thank you again and may God bless you."

            Did you hear what he said in that note?  It really is quite incredible.  "I think God sent me to Sunrise..."  I would agree with that.  I think God sends lots of people here because God knows how they are going to be received.  God sends people to you.  But get this next part.  "...I think that saved my life..."  Incredible isn't it?  But that really is the ministry that God gives to the church...to save people's lives.  And you do it.  You make it happen, when you care for people and treat them like real people in a world that so often treats them like "its." 

            Keep up the good work.  There's lots of joy in it!